Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
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