i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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