Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize
