I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
