he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
organizing the empties. That sober.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
