see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
