Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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