Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
worst night to have a conscience
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
