My boss' voice literally gives me gas
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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