Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Randomize
