I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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