You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
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