she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
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