Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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