Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
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