she was so not down for the gang bang
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
