just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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