When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
It's not a walk of shame if you run
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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