I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
