My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
my god I love twenty year old dicks
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Randomize
