Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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