she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
