you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
