my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
