why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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