thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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