Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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