I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
