So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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