Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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