I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
