i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
apparently the secret to your success is patron
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
