So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
