I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
