You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
