Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
