she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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