that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize