he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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