His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
