True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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