Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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