If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
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