it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
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