I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I enjoy the company of your penis
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