Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Do you have feelings for this penis?
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
