so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
My ass is underappreciated
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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