She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize