i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
