piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Randomize
